critters ‘n’ wine

So, have you ever wondered what the Eraserhead baby would have been like if it was a girl and had an angsty adolescence? So have I, which is why I saw Splice. I think I would agree with the solid C+ it seems to be getting from reviewers I respect. The acting is good, the critter effects are stunning, and I found it interesting to watch the two leads try to figure out what to do with their creation. They’re both pretty unlikeable people, which some folks have complained about, but that’s what made it interesting for me in a trainwrecky way – this is what happens when two people who probably shouldn’t even be trusted with house pets end up raising a kid. The last third or so, however, is just god-awful. Among the many things that left me annoyed was a completely gratuitous rape scene that makes no sense whatsoever in the context of the plot, and is clearly just thrown in as a means of punishing the female lead. Yeah, she makes terrible decisions throughout the movie, but that particular form of making a lady character pay for her mistakes is both sexist and trite.

This review is a good, thoughtful critique. I don’t agree entirely with her conclusions regarding the movie’s handling of gender roles – while maybe some of the lead critter’s stereotypically-girly mannerisms were supposed to be innate, her “mother” is also shown pushing ideas of femininity on her (giving her a Barbie doll, putting makeup on her, etc.) which I thought had something to do with it as well. But still, worth a read – I especially agree with what she says about the aforementioned wretched ending.

Oh, and if you’re going to tell me to read that 394820-page review written in all caps: don’t bother. I have no patience for reviews of horror movies which have nothing to say but “OMG GROSS.” If you’re surprised by gore and unpleasantness in a horror movie, especially a medical one, you probably wander outside in thunderstorms and wonder why you’re feeling a little damp. (Another thing which got me about reviews of this movie was people saying that it’s based in bad science. Yes, it is, but you can say the same thing about Frankenstein, Alien, The Brood…well, virtually every horror/sci-fi movie ever made.)

Also: I found out that boxwine comes in individual servings now. Which can be easily taken somewhere like, say, a theater. Not that I would ever do that. Ahem.


~ by Smellen on June 9, 2010.

3 Responses to “critters ‘n’ wine”

  1. I don’t intend to see this movie, unless it’s later on down the line somewhere, but the review makes me twitch. Did you see “Slither?” Slither managed to abstract its rape scenes by one degree, which is almost more upsetting.

    • I saw Slither a while ago. I liked it for the most part because it was campy and fun without being too annoyingly self-aware about it, but I do remember a couple scenes being a bit unsettling – the one where the first infected dude brings the Loose Woman (TM) back to his house and barfs slugs into her stands out.

  2. Yea, that’s one of the most overt – and then she gets HUUUUGE and preggers from it… Then the scene where the slug tries to force itself down the bathing girl’s throat – I saw it at a movie night and one or two folks couldn’t sit through that. The campy tone made these scenes all the more confusing.
    I did, however, love the final creature – the huge, amorphous blob-man that literally absorbs anyone that gets near it. Like living exterior cancer. That worked well.

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